If the Russians love their children too

In 1985, the English musician and songwriter, Sting, released a song entitled Russians (song and lyrics found here). I remember where I was when I first heard the chilling lyrics that ended, "What might save us, me and you is if the Russians love their children too."  Sting was writing about the threat of nuclear war, but the plague of being orphaned has devastated the children of Russian far more than war. The song's mournful chords and poignant words brought quick tears to my eyes. It also apparently planted a seed deep in my heart. It would take 17 years for the seed to germinate and deliver, at the age of seven, my youngest son, Roma from Russia.

In 1992, at their annual Spring concert, my eldest daughter's fifth grade chorus sang Song for a Russian Child, (found here) commemorating the fall of Communism. I stifled sobs, thankful for the dim lights. No one around me seemed so "touched." (Admittedly, I am a crier!) I think God was foreshadowing what was to come, softening my heart for the children of Russian. The particular Russia child He would send to me wouldn't be born for another two and a half years, but He watered the seed.

When Godless Communism inevitably failed, generations of Russians were optimistic, but untrained in love and altruism. (During the height of Communism, only 6-10 % of the population could be labeled as "believers in God.") Almost 800,000 Russian orphans are the consequence. Ninety-five percent are "social" orphans, meaning they have at least one parent who has either voluntarily turned them over to the state-run orphan system, or who has had their parental rights terminated by the courts. Less than 3%  are considered for adoption by Russian families.

Orphan Care Resources (OCR) is equipping believers to care for orphans, and thus, correcting the broken system. In light of Putin's pending ban on American adoptions, the success of OCR is just in the nick of time, as if God has heard the cry of his people and devised an alternate plan for His cast-off children. With the help of OCR, Russian and Ukrainian Christians are stepping up and being trained to answer God's call to take care of their country's forsaken children.

Recently compiled 2012 data (from the Russian OCR website) reveals hopeful news:

• 60 new training events advertised

• 67,862 potential adoptive parents who attended motivational events

• 24,000 prints resources distributed

• 3,049,434 hits on website, compared to 671,000 in 2011

• 1,150 people receiving regular resource and event updates, up from 400 in 2011

• 1,554 prospective parents attended pre-adoption training.

• 561 children placed with families

• 948 parents received post-adoption counseling

I pray the 3% of Russian adoptions by Russian parents mushrooms at such a rate that we cannot miss God's hand in the transformation.  As these new parents embrace God's call to take care of the "least of these," they will discover what Godless Communism could never teach them: the joy that comes from love, sacrifice, and obedience to God's call, when the Russians love their children too.

Pure and faultless religion

On our best days, we Christians strive to line our hearts up with the heart of God. Tall order, no doubt. In our search to find the Divine Will, we cannot avoid that unambiguous verse, James 1:27, that defines pure and faultless religion as taking care of orphans in their distress. Since we don't  often encounter orphans, their uncomfortable reality is easy to avoid.

I am not an expert on adoption, but I had a crash course during our adventure described in  But the Greatest of These is Love. After that enlightenment, I cannot go back into the darkness of ignorance.

The statistics are heartbreaking. My knowledge is limited to Russian orphans, but, tragically, there is no short supply of orphans anywhere in the world.

The Russian Children Welfare Society reports,

• 740,000 orphans live in Russia, a troubling number that grows by 113,000 per year, according to UNICEF.
• Less than 3% of those children are being considered for adoption by Russian families.
• Approximately 95% are "social" orphans, meaning they have at least one living parent who has relinquished them to the negligent care of the broken state system.  
• The number of orphanages in Russia in 2012 was 2,176, up 100% in the last decade. The facilities often lack basic necessities such as heat, running water, and functional kitchens. 

According to the Russian Ministry of Education

• 1500 children leave the orphanages each year, usually at the age of 16 or 17, as they "age out" of the system, poorly equipped to function in society.
• 50% fall into a high risk category after graduation.
• 40% became involved in criminal activity.
• 10% commit suicide.
• 33% remain unemployed.
• 20% become homeless.
• Only 4% are admitted to universities.

According to the Ministries of Internal Affairs

• 2.5 million children born in Russia are homeless.
• 50% of Russian children are born into poverty.
• In the last decade, the number of children in Russia has decreased by 4 million. Over four times more abortions are recorded than live births. 
• 617,000 Russian children are disabled. Twenty babies a day are born to HIV mothers, two of which will be abandoned at birth. 
• 70% of medical equipment in hospitals are outdated or broken. 
• 60% of Russia's youth are in poor physical or psychological health.
• Only 15-20% of newborn Russian babies are considered healthy. 

These statistics paint a dismal picture of innocent children at risk—the "least of these."

Yet, God has promised that he will not leave us orphans. What is our responsibility, now that we know the facts? This knowledge becomes more important, now, with the ban on American adoptions pending in Russia. This political move will devastate the children languishing in orphanages, especially the handicapped ones, who are warehoused in asylums, left to die, starved of human contact, even those with minor physical handicaps.

I invite you to watch this heartbreaking, yet hopeful Dateline report The Boy From Baby House 10, a true, and perhaps typical account of the life of a boy in an orphanage, except Vanya is one of the few who make it out of the system, due only to a few people who took an interest in him.

If your heart is tugged to help, and it will be if you have a pulse, please consider getting involved on some level with an orphan care organization, such as Orphan Care Resources. One hundred percent of the profits of my book will be donated to some type of orphan care, including OCR and direct gifts to hosting and adopting families.

What can you do to help?

Be thankful in all things!

Consider it all joy . . .  whenever we face trials of many kinds, because testing of our faith produces many beneficial consequences, like patience, endurance, character, and hope. But the awkward reality of trials is they often involve suffering, and in spite of the benefits, there is no long line to sign up for suffering. James, the brother of Jesus, suggests our trials will produce joy in us; even so, we are much more likely to run from trials than embrace them. Run as we might, trials and suffering are as inevitable as rain.

My most interesting friends are interesting because their testimonies involve suffering. Talk to anyone who lived through unimaginable trials, and their stories of "overcoming" are tinted with joy of experiencing a  revelation of Something infinitely bigger than ourselves. 

I have a friend from my school days, back from fifth grade. After high school graduation, my contact with Ann was confined to high school reunions every five years. (Even though I live five hours away, I never miss a reunion.) One reunion, about twelve years ago, Ann was minus her left arm, all the way up to the shoulder. But an eight year battle with an aggressive cancer hadn't stolen her spirit. She was her usually bubbly self, hugging everyone with one arm, as if nothing had changed. A lot had changed for Ann.

When I finally had a moment with Ann alone, I expressed my compassion for her loss. Her words surprised me. "Debbie, it was the best thing that could have happened to me."

Now obviously, losing her arm didn't cause Ann's joy, otherwise we would all be lopping off our limbs! What I recognized in Ann was something much deeper than the tragic loss of her arm.  Something had changed Ann, for the better. She didn't have self-pity, but a hope that is other-worldly.

Now with social media, I "speak" with Ann regularly.  I had the pleasure to talk to Ann on the phone this week. Her life has been marked by trials, more than her share. And yet, there is pure joy. She speaks freely of God and her faith. And her transformed life through seemingly unbearable hardships. 

Does Ann have it all together? No. Neither do I! (If you do, we need to talk!)

For many, the deal breaker for belief in a caring, personal God, is suffering. How could a loving God allow suffering? Yet, if we didn't face trials, how could we be compassionate to others who have? How could we "feel" their pain?  Would we feel compelled to encourage others if we never needed a kind word of encouragement ourselves? Our trials and suffering bond us to one another, as well as to God.

Did God cause Ann to lose her arm, or 911, or fill-in-the-blank with your own tragedy? I don't believe God causes these incidents to punish us, but He allows them, and shows up in the pain. When we have hit rock bottom, God is always there, when often, no one else is. 

Paradoxically, the moments in our lives that bring us indescribable joy, are not the day we finally bought that dream house, or landed that lucrative job, or anything else that we might have expected to finally be the ultimate producer of joy. These moments don't last as long as we would expect, nor give us the joy we had hoped for. 

Today, consider writing your own testimony  Ponder your own personal suffering and how it changed you. 

God tells us to be thankful in all things. 

consider it all joy

Over the past ten years when I have told people our youngest son was adopted from Russia at the age of seven, their eyebrows go up. People seem intrigued by this information, and they have questions: What made us consider adoption, and why did we adopt an older boy from Russia? Did we consider the numerous candidates in the foster system?

When I respond that I didn’t choose an older boy from Russia, God chose him for me, the eyebrows go up again, but the eyes look anywhere except at me. I am thankful that I do not have to squirm under the scrutinizing gaze of cynicism coming at me from Cyberspace. I know how crazy it sounds! I am learning to answer the disembodied words from strangers. And what I am learning is that we were not the only ones who have had this mystical experience of feeling like God was drawing us toward adoption, that God was the Ultimate matchmaker, lining our family up with a perfect fit for a child who was without a family,  that adopting was something we were "supposed to do."

There are the skeptics, of course, but strangers have messaged me to say that they too are members of the "secret society of 'called' adoptive moms," a label I use in the book to describe how it felt. First against my knowledge, and later against my will, I felt God was selecting me to be the mother of one of His lost and forgotten children. So why did God chose Russia and Roma? Of course I do not know the full answer, but I suspect part of it is because Roma fits so well into our family. He kids like us, his personality is so  similar to ours, we understand each other on a higher level, and I am a strong-willed mother to a hard-headed boy! My older son said, when Roma came, that, until he could think of Roma as a brother, he would consider him an “exchange student from God.” Rearing a child sent from God is a duty not to be taken lightly! Another reason, perhaps more important in God's economy, is that during this experience, we have learned to trust that God knows what we need better than we do. God wants total surrender and obedience.

The reward for our obedience, albeit reluctant and whiny on my part, included cup-running-over joy and blessings!